He dares talk to me that way without a hat. It is about time we stopped all this, this noise of no hats.

I hear heads. I hear your heads. Screaming, babbling, whining, singing so far out of key you could shatter wood. Hatless, this is the noise you make.

And I am just about tired of it.

You have been warned. I am getting the mayonnaise, and do not doubt for one pathetic, deadly moment that I do not have the guts to use it.

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