I asked him, "Why's it never rain bitters?" and I guess I can't fault him for his reply: "There would be a lot of car crashes and men standing in the street with their mouths open and laying in the gutters lapping at the run off."

They say the truth hurts, sure, but this is a doubleplusungood pain in my ass, this incessant torrent drowning my fair land that continues to doggedly not turn into snow OR beer.

I'm growing miffed and thirsty.

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